Love.

A while back I was using my stand mixer a lot. There were cakes being made, whipped cream being whipped up and it was just beautiful. It reminded me of the love that came from this mixer. It has a history, a little sordid and slightly embarrassing to myself. It is not one of my finer moments, more of awful selfishness. And I want to tell this story now. This post doesn't have a recipe attached to it today. It has a deep heart felt meaning though, so choose to read it or not but the truth is it's a love story.

My husband is the best gift giver I know. He wasn't always that way though. Long before Jay and I married we dated. He was my quintessential "high school sweetheart"(I loath that term). I was given surround sound systems and wireless PlayStation controllers.Oh yes, it's true. Then there was the Christmas the stand mixer made its appearance.

It was wrapped and under the tree. It was a BIG box. I had been told I couldn't move it. I'm an excellent guesser by the way. If time serves me right it was maybe 2 weeks before Christmas and I decided to figure out what the big box was. With a one finger push(seriously) I tapped the box and instantly knew what it was. It was the ever so coveted KITCHEN AID STAND MIXER. I CRIED. I SOBBED. I WAS FURIOUS. Jay was not home yet so I pouted, thought about what I was going to do. Was I going to tell him I knew what it was? Was I going to tell him how I felt? He came home. And I blurted everything out. How I thought I knew what my gift was, how I didn't want it and how upset I was.

***Back story to this: I lived with 4 boys, I was 20 years old. I had dated Jay for close to 4 years. He couldn't think of anything better??? Many times I had said how much I'd love to have this mixer-IF and WHEN I had my own place, when I was older. Not now.***

It was selfish that I was so mad about this gift. I knew by the look on his face he was hurt. Jay knew how much I would love to have this mixer. I explained that I wanted to be able to pick out a fun color one day to match my kitchen and it was going to be so "adult" of me. He thought since he had a good job and could afford the mixer he knew I would love why not? He even explained he got a white one because it went with everything. Such logic. It was an argument. He told me he would take it back. But he didn't. And truly I didn't want him too.

Dramatic? Yes. But today-that White, Kitchen Aid Stand Mixer sits proudly on the counter in the kitchen of the house that Jay and I pay the mortgage on. In a house we have spent four and a half years in. Together. With our 3 crazy dogs. I made mashed potatoes and a pumpkin pound cake in that mixer last week. I'll make so much more in it too. Before I had that mixer I made homemade cheesecakes for everyone as a Christmas gift one year. My grandmother said she thought hers was delicious and she could taste the love I put in it. That's the way I want everything to taste that comes from that mixer. There are so many words to describe food, why not love?